Danish boiled sweets

I don't know if you need to be genetically Danish, or if you need to be born in Denmark, or what to appreciate Danish confectionery, but despite a decade of trying, I must finally concede that Danish sweets are utterly vile. Maybe they are meant to be to encourage a healthier lifestyle? If you make sweets taste like that even kids will ask for apples instead, cunning...

The little transparent ones are passable but disconcerting. Despite being red they taste of creamy vanilla custard. They feel wrong, but can be eaten. The yellow lumps smell strongly of banana but once in your mouth emit a smelly-sockness that is barf-worthy. The black taste of that usual hideous mix of warmth, salt and liquorice. I imagine traditional liquorice might taste like this, had you buried it, wrapped in seaweed on a beach for the summer. But the blue take the biscuit. They are somewhere between salt liquorice and toe nail cheese once again, but with no banana disguise it this time. There's definitely a certain je ne sais quoi in there.

I don't think Lindt should be worried! ;-)